Recently I went to two different wedding event and one make us bridesmaid felt quite bad during and after the event. I am bridesmaid for two different weddings and here is the thing I want to ask for opinion..should bridesmaid follow bride rules and not be asked for any opinion? First one was quite pleasant, brides asked for dates if we are going to do hen’s night, she is fine without.. If yes she don’t mind just a simple one at her place, also super kind to say she can make food and stuff. We bridesmaid really wanted to surprise her so we book a hotel and told her it was for my friend casual staycation and surprised her.. asked us for clothes style, top to even toe and let us chose what style we like but just follow her colour theme. Second one was super meh(my brother’s wife) Want a hen’s night on certain dates, and asked if we can take off or leave because they rest of the date she is occupied(understandable) but some of us just can’t make it due to work and she will be upset, saying “oh then it’s fine don’t need it then.” Then coming to bridesmaid clothes she just asked for our sizes without asking if we will be comfy in the dress, turn out it’s an tube dress which 3 of the bridesmaid were super uncomfy in it and couldn’t voice out as we don’t want things to turn sour.. they were so uncomfy the whole day but fake a smile with it.. As sister-in-law I help to ask before she made the purchase if she could give us a few style to choose. She said that’s the only style she like and it just suit her overall theme.. May I know if it’s too much for us to expect her to ask for our opinion? Or she is the bride we should suck it up follow her way?