Recent posts

  • Sweet girl
    #11973advice· 18d ago

    TLDR: sweet looking girl emphasising that evergreen men are dealbreakers. Met a super cute girl online and went on a 1st date with her and vibe crazily well. She shared about her encounters with men and how they always hit on her and what not. Sounds very red flag but her cute outlook and gentle voice made me overlook anything that seems like a red flag and fall straight for her. She told me not to ask her about her sexual history and kept telling me how great her ex was. Even showed me a photo of him to prove how good looking he was. She held my hand on the 1st date. Left the 1st date missing her so much and wanting her badly. 2 days later we started texting more and she opened up more over text and kept sending me multiple photos of fit and handsome looking men who trains in the gym and offering her PT sessions for free. She kindly rejected these offers because these fit and handsome guys are sadly virgin. Again, big dealbreaker for her. I started to feel uncomfortable and decided ask her what is she looking for. She said she is looking for something serious and not into casuals. She friendzoned all the evergreen guys who tried to hit on her and did not do anything sexual with them even on a 1 to 1 holiday. They only did wholesome stuff. I wanted to cut her off, only to have her calling me with her sweet and gentle tone to tell me that her intention was to be open about her history and she didn’t mean to upset me or whatsoever. She even wrote a long text to illustrate every single details of our first date together and try to win me back. Guess what? I turned from thinking she was major red flag, to be smittened by her all over again. I fall even deeper in love with her and felt like I need to see her immediately. Need everyone here to advise. Do you think this girl is a red flag? Or everyone has their past and this should not matter? I’m in a crazy dilemma but I love to meet her over and over again to enjoy the sweet dating feel.

    👍 0❤️ 0😂 0
    0
  • How to geet elderly parents to feel safe amongst digital scams?
    #11965rant· 18d ago

    My father has been really over the top paranoid about being scammed. It gotten worst over time now that he will call or text bomb me during work when he receives any prompts from any App on his phone. There was once he received a prompt from WhatsApp to update and he called me to ask if it's ok to update. He have done the update multiple times before and I have told him a dozen times, he have to update to continue using WhatsApp. Then there was the Health365 App which will sometimes ask you to relogin. He have to bomb me with over 10 WhatsApp with images to confirm it's not phising. Now even when those random WhatsApp group added him (these are probably real scam), he have to text me to ask if it's scam! Honestly, it's getting annoying. He won't stop till there's like 20 messages. But I am working, can't be answering his calls and messages 24/7! I already told him many times that I can't always answer his calls or messages when I am at work so he don't need to bombard me. If I can answer, I will or he could ignore till I get home. I now mute my phone at work because it gets irritating and affects my colleagues when my phone kept ringing. I really thought about getting him a "dumb phone" but I am not sure if those can use WhatsApp, health 365 and Yuu which he use often.

    👍 0❤️ 0😂 0
    0
  • I wish pets are valid reasons for taking leave
    #11964rant· 18d ago

    I know there are "valid reasons" to take leave but pets aren't one of them. To many who didn't want kids, pets are just like their kids. But kids are valid reason to take urgent leave but pets are not. At least that's for my case. I had a really old poddle who was my mum's companion for 8 years before she passed away. Now it's just me and the poddle. She is at the end of her journey too and I wished to take time off to send her off. The vet had advised me to put her to sleep because prolonging it would just make her suffer longer. I decided to take a halfday off to accompany her on her last journey and then 1 day to clear out her things and mourn. I applied for unpaid leave and when asked about the reason, I told my boss honestly. I don't think it's something I should lie about. My poddle is just like my child and when my mum was alive, she called her "xun zai" (Cantonese for grandchildren). My superior was pretty insensitive and blurted out, "for a dog?" She still approved 1.5days of unpaid leave. I know she wasn't happy about it. On the last department meeting before my unpaid leave, my superior sarcastically mentioned "someone find her pet more important than her responsibility at work, so now you all have to take over her parts." Lucky for me, my team members are more understanding and we are ahead of time. It's after this incident that I really wish that pets death be allowed to include for compassionate leave ... Or at least don't be mean to those who applied for unpaid leave for their pets.

    👍 0❤️ 0😂 0
    0
  • How to get over the guilt and grieve
    #11957advice· 18d ago

    This may not be something as interesting to read as compare to the other submissions here. I am seeking some words of comfort, please be kind. My mom passed away 2 years ago, till today I am still grieving her death. Her death came on very suddenly with no warning. I still remember we were celebrating my sis birthday the day before her demise. No signs of illness, stress. It was a really happy day...But the next day, she was complaining about chest pain & for the first time in her life (not including her giving birth), she volunteered to go to the hospital. It was as if she knew she will go any time that day, but she didn't want to scared us. On the way to the hospital,she had cardiac arrest and she was rushed onto emergency surgery. When the rest of us arrived at the hospital, the diagnosis was still quite positive after her surgery. Less than 2 hours later, we got the news that she has passed on. From here on, the constant guilt has been eating me up bit by bit. I have so many 'whys', "what ifs', 'where went wrong' thoughts. I have been plague with insomnia, anxiety. And given that I was being retrenched a month after her death from a company that I have been for almost a decade. I almost wanted to end everything and joined my mom. With my mom passing, my career since then seems to have go downhill as well. I will be jobless again soon. Thoughts of joining my mom have crossed my mind numerous time. But what stopped me is because I still have my old father, sibling and my pets. So up till today, I am still struggling with guilt and can't get over the grieving part. Can someone advise how can I overcome the guilt and is there a proper way to grief so then I can slowly step out of this dark period of my life?

    👍 0❤️ 0😂 0
    0
  • Troubled working wife
    #11956rant· 18d ago

    Im just ranting because im always doing everything myself - cleaning our house/washing toilets - doing laundry/ironing - clean dishes etc - arrange handyman - do the fan cleaning or electrical works The husband doesnt do anything and plays game or work which he does very well and earns alot. When asked to help he say aiyah just hire help but we both dislike outsiders at home so.. what talking you?? I wish he will be more handson to help our around the house than being good for only earning money! But i guess you have to be contented with own choice.. #rant

    👍 0❤️ 0😂 0
    0
  • What should l do?
    #11955advice· 18d ago

    I met a guy thru fb dating app, l have known him for one years now. At first we chatted everyday and met up very often but after a while he take 1-2 days to reply my chat and we didn't met up at all. When l ask him he told me he doesn't feel like into relationship and he wants to be single. Recently we have travelled together, he has tried to be in relationship with me but he couldn't accept himself to be in relationship. He prefers single as of now. He told me if you have suitors or any guys u interested in, go and try. He okay for us to chat online and be online friends. As of now, we still chatting. l have asked him before if he wants our relationship as online friends only, he couldn't answer me. What should l do? Should l let go?

    👍 0❤️ 0😂 0
    0