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im currently in a relationship but there are nights when i still have nightmares of my ex. what's even frightening is how it's so similar to what happened between us. the same him and the same girl who i've always felt that he cheated me with. it was a toxic relationship after our 1 year mark. once i caught him using his phone under the blanket while i was giving him bj and hj. turns out, he was probably using his phone to look at the girl's photos. there was once i found a video of the girl in her sports bra in his hidden gallery. i've also once found out that he was comfortably talking to her about her boob size. even though she was attached back then, it felt like they were both cheating behind my back. reassurance wasn't received by me, but questions like why was i scrolling his phone and invading his privacy. when i think back, i pity myself for begging him to stay, i pity myself for treating him way better than he treat me. and what's sad is that during our relationship and till now, i still have nightmares of the 2 of them. i really dont know what did i do to deserve this treatment. im currently in my third year and he's a freshie. for the love of god, please dont make me see him in school, because it'll just makes me feel sad for myself.