Recent posts

Hello! I just wanted to share my story with whoever wrote about housing security being engaged to a foreigner. I personally think some comments worded very harshly, but it's kind of true. You need to be secure and make plans together with your partner and be okay wth delays. Life is always unexpected. That said, yes, not having security when you planned for it is definitely anxiety inducing. I have friends who are married in countries that predominatly rent and not own their place (central europe), and this has caused a lot of friction in their relationship when they realise home ownership was absolutely not considered by their partners. The first thing that stood out to me was, all your friends are from SG still. That's fine but try to make friends with Singaporeans overseas. There are FB groups for this. You need a support channel to help you through your journey and Singaporeans back home very unfortunately cannot do much for you. So my story is similar to yours, except we never really counted on inheriting anything from either side of our family. We procrastinated getting married and Covid happened so since the resale market went crazy, I was the one who decided I'm okay to leave Singapore to try something new. We now own our humble apartment in a small city of our choice but it took a while to get here. There is a few key potholes when getting married to a foreigner. Especially if you are a girl marrying white man (sorry, need to call out this group). A majority of the spouse migrants rely on their husband to provide. This means you will be reliant on him and his family for any sort of resources, and this co-dependency is not healthy. I always say, when you look for a partner, you must be sure you can provide something equal in exchange. Don't just take, give. You decided to marry him because you know he can provide / has good character. And I am sure you are of good character as you just want your future family's future to be secure, but you are lacking leverage so you need to find that for yourself. Anything outside the typical Singapore story is difficult, because you have nothing to reference from. But also because the Singapore story is so well-defined, you can always come home and live that story. HDB with decaying lease you can get under 400k. Have your kid and then BTO later is also an option. Point is, you are not locked out. So discuss with him again and see where you final destination should be, then buy in that location when the time is right. A home is a 25 year mortgage commitment, so it is a big decision and oftentimes not an easy one to make for intl couples, so I get it. But what a privilege to have this choice, am I right?