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I’m in my 30s, the sole breadwinner for my family, and I feel like I’m being suffocated. Just need to vent and see if any fellow Singaporeans have survived this. The "Boss" and the "Servant": My parents are in their 70s. My dad is an old-school patriarch who stopped working 20+ years ago and spent my youth gambling away my part-time job money. Since then, he’s done zero housework and has no social life—just sits at home watching TV. My mom (primary school ed, cannot speak English) is his full-time enabler. She caters to his every whim; she’ll even pull the window blinds for him while he’s sitting right next to them. The Situation Now: He’s currently hospitalized and confirmed to have Dementia. He’s physically mobile but "logistically helpless." Both my parents can’t handle admin, bills, or follow medical instructions. Before he was diagnosed with Dementia, the torturing already begins. He also "cries wolf" constantly—insisting he’s dying so we call him an ambulance (but if you ask him if he can walk he says yes), or demanding to all his money from the bank because he’s paranoid our govt is taking his money (even though govt has been the one giving him $$). The "Wall" (My Mom): I’ve done the legwork. I’ve talked to the Social Worker, got the referral for respite care, bought a wheelchair to standby for emergency, and am installing sensors/cameras/emergency alarms. My mom’s response to everything? "He won't want, he won't use" I bought a wheelchair for emergencies? "He won't like it, it's too small." I suggest daycare or respite? "He won't want to go there." "He won't want strangers to come." Despite me being the only one working to keep this family afloat, she tells me I cannot go overseas or have a life because she "cannot handle it alone." Yet, she shuts down every support system I try to set up to help her handle it. The Reality: If I were "less Asian," I would have walked away years ago. He didn’t provide for me; he took from me. Now I’m the 24/7 administrator, chauffeur, and crisis manager. Anyone with similar experience? Breaking the "He won't want" loop: How do you convince a traditional mother that safety trumps the "boss's" ego? Boundary setting: How do you reclaim your life when you're the sole provider but also an emotional hostage?